Saturday, October 23, 2010

When I am an old lady

WHEN I'M AN OLD LADY

When I'm an old lady I'll live with my kids.
And make their lives happy and filled with such fun!
I want to pay back all the joy they've provided,
Returning each deed, oh! They’ll be so excited!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.

I'll write on the wall with red, white and blue
And bounce on the furniture wearing my shoes.
I'll drink from the carton and then leave it out.
I'll stuff all the toilets and oh! How they'll shout!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.

When they're on the phone and just out of reach
I'll get into things like sugar and bleach.
Oh, they'll snap their fingers and then shake their heads
And when that is done, I'll hide under my bed.
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.

When they cook dinner and call me to meals
I'll not eat my green beans or salads congealed.
I'll gag on my okra, spill milk on the table,
And when they get angry run fast as I'm able!
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.


I'll set close to the TV, through the channels I'll click,
I'll cross both my eyes to see if they'll stick.
I'll take off my socks and throw one away.
I'll play in the mud until the end of the day.
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.

And later in bed, I'll lay back and sigh
And thank God in prayer and then close my eyes.
And my kids will look down with a smile slowly creeping
And say with groan "she's so sweet when she's sleeping..."
When I'm an old lady and live with my kids.

Author
Unknown

Friday, October 22, 2010

test your knowledge!

1. The maker doesn't want it; the buyer doesn't use it; and the user doesn't see it. What is it?

2. A child is born in Boston, Massachusetts to parents who were both born in Boston, Massachusetts. The child is not a United States citizen. How is this possible?

3. Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth?

4. Clara Clatter was born on December 27th, yet her birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?

5. Captain Frank and some of the boys were exchanging old war stories. Art Bragg offered one about how his grandfather led a battalion against a German division during World War I. Through brilliant maneuvers he defeated them and captured valuable territory. After the battle, he was presented with a sword bearing the inscription "To Captain Bragg for Bravery, Daring and Leadership. World War One. From the Men of Battalion 8". Captain Frank looked at Art and said: "You really don't expect anyone to believe that yarn, do you?" What's wrong with the story?

6. What is one thing that all wise men, regardless of their religion or politics, agree is between heaven and earth?

7. In what year did Christmas and New Year's fall in the same year?

8. A woman from New York married ten different men from that city, yet she did not break any laws. None of these men died and she never divorced. How was this possible?

9. Why are 1990 American dollar bills worth more than 1989 American dollar bills?

10. How many times can you subtract the number 5 from 25?

11. A taxi driver was called to take a group of passengers to the train station. The station is normally an hour away, but with traffic being extra heavy, it took a full hour and a half. On the return trip the traffic was still as heavy and yet it took only 90 minutes. Why?

12. How could you rearrange the letters in the words "new door" to make one word? Note: There is only one correct answer.

13. Even if they are starving, natives living in the Arctic will never eat a penguin's egg. Why not?

14. Which is correct to say: "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?

15. In Okmulgee, Oklahoma, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

16. There were an electrician and a plumber waiting in line for admission to the "International Home Show". One of them was the father of the other's son. How could this be possible?

17. After the new Canon Law that took effect on November 27, 1983, would a Roman Catholic man be allowed to marry his widow's sister?


here are the answers: how did you do?

1. A coffin

2. The child was born before 1776

3. Mount Everest, it just hadn't been discovered!

4. Clara lives in the southern hemisphere.

5. World War I wasn't called "World War I" until World War II.

6. The word "and".

7. They fall in the same year every year, New Year's Day just arrives very early in the year and Christmas arrives very late in the same year.

8. The lady was a Justice of the Peace.

9. One thousand nine hundred and ninety dollar bills are worth one dollar more than one thousand nine hundred and eighty-nine dollar bills.

10. Only once, then you are subtracting it from 20.

11. An hour and a half IS 90 minutes.

12. "one word"

13. Penguins live in the Antarctic.

14. Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow.

15. You have to take a picture of a man with a camera, not with a wooden leg.

16. They were husband and wife.

17. He can't because he's dead.

say what?

From Parade Magazine - October 14, 2001


How do you pronounce "ghoti"?

Answer: fish

Explanation: The playwright George Bernard Shaw
(an advocate of spelling reform) supposedly said
the word "fish" could be spelled "ghoti" because:

gh is pronounced like an f in "cough"
o is pronounced like an I in "women"
ti is pronounced like the sh in "nation"

Monday, October 18, 2010

Saturday, October 16, 2010

wise words from a woman:

The reason the human race has survived so long is that women correct men's mistakes, cover for them, clean up their messes, and feed them.

Otherwise, men would have gone extinct a loooooonnnnnngggggg time ago!!!!

- Jude M.

Bucket List

On a board I visit someone asked for our 'bucket lists' so I thought I'd spread the thought around on here. What is your bucket list? Do you have one?

Mine is mostly completed; here are the remainders:

1) visit Ireland
2) visit Australia
3) take grandkids out camping at the ocean (like I did my kids)
4) get Phd
5) swim with dolphins
6) make soap -good soap, lol!
7) keep doing random acts of kindness and not be caught

is it really better to have loved and lost....?

There is a saying that it is better to have loved and lost, then never loved at all.

I am not sure if I do or do not agree.

Seems LOVE is so shallow these days, I have to wonder if anyone has even felt real love. People hooking up with a different person every week or so -having sex...thinking that is all there is. It is no wonder our kids are so screwed up.

no one even KNOWS what commitment even IS! Vows are made to be broken if someone simply get bored or their partner doesn't cook dinner right or actually is exhausted and can not perform six times a day. So it is off to find a new partner.

No one really TALKS anymore either: it's all text messages, blogs, emails, instant messages, and an awkward "hi how are ya" when you actually do run into a person you know at the store.

People are becoming people-phobic. Forgetting (or not learning) social graces, respectful discourse, and genuine happiness at just seeing a loved one.

As the world gets smaller, we pull ourselves in even tighter; pretending that we are reaching out via all this faux means of communication.

We are forgetting about our fundamental need to physically see and interact with each other.

We are accepting less than what we are truly needing.

What does that say about us? And where is this going to lead us?

I've watched our species go from neighbors knowing neighbors and children outside playing (ALL the kids) all day long -every day and mostly not needing supervision -to us not even knowing, let alone saying 'hi' to the neighbors and kids INSIDE playing video games or on the computer as they get fat.

Worry about child predators scooping up our kids if they go outside and they are hunted online.

Worrying about where our next paycheck is coming from in this economy. Worried about being able to feed our kids.

Some have taken steps to ease many of the worries. They have become 'prepared' or are in the process of 'preparing'.

Many teach their kids what it is really like out in the world and teach them to protect themselves for those times they are not around mom and dad (or just mom or just dad). Many raise gardens, chickens, etc... so they know there will be food to eat. Others buy on sale and stock up that way so they also know there will be food to eat. Many have begun to make things last! No more toss it in the garbage cause I can get another one -type of mentality. Rinse, reuse, fix, reuse again...etc. People are getting their bills paid off so no one can take their car or home if they lose their job.

And remarkably, a small amount of people are actually getting to know real people again. They may meet them online but then they meet them in person and really get to know them. Friendships are being forged. These ones are proving the old age adage that everything is basically neutral: it can be used for good or for bad.

So I hope more begin to use all this "new technology" in good and positive ways. And do not allow it to be the ONLY form of communication with people you have.

So is it really better to love and lost? I still don't know; seems I went off on a tangent in a totally different direction...yet it does still tie in. lol! typical me. I guess I'm saying that we will never really know since so much of what we now think of as 'love' really isn't. Too many are NOT experiencing real love; the kind you DO fight for and DO take seriously.

Have a great day!

Saturday, October 2, 2010

big court cases

So I got a notice yesterday in my email on how I am a potential party to a case against a company that is being sued. A link was given so I could review my rights; but what caught my eye was that I would get to share in the settlement of something like $250,000 which would be shared by all the plaintiffs which would net me about $20 if the case was settled yet the lawyers would get 1.3 million dollars.

so now we know the real reason our courts are backed up and suck. lawyers should be getting a LOWER amount than the plaintiffs. Like less than 30%

yep this system sucks!